February 2012
me: I should go shower now
(five minutes later)
(another five minutes later)
(yet another five minutes later)
(more five minute intervals)
someone: (goes into the bathroom)
me: wow fuck you I was JUST about to go take a shower
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Doctor: You say you're experiencing constant pain. Where does it hurt?
Me: Everything
Me: Everything hurts
Doctor: Whe-
Me: My ships are sinking
Me: All of them
Me: All of my ships
Doctor: Oh fuck, you're one of those people
my 2012 election slogan
“vote for obama because everyone else is scary as fuck”
